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  • outofsmallthingsli
    • Jul 24
    • 3 min read

My Rocky Relationship with Processing Emotions


I’ve had my fair share of shunning emotions, and my initial attempts at processing them were just as rocky. If you’re an analytical thinker or someone who finds themselves in their head a lot, this post is for you!

 

Before learning about emotional processing, I used to think handling emotions was about figuring out how to fix them or cover them up. For example, frustration for me meant trying to change reality to fit my expectations or hiding it well enough that no one noticed. Little did I know, this approach was far from effective.

 

The first time I encountered the idea that emotions are just “vibrations in your body,” I was confused. During my life coach certification, I saw a coach asking a client about where the emotion was in her body, its color, and size. The client’s vivid descriptions and subsequent relief amazed me. I thought it was strange at first, but the genuine relief was undeniable. It took me months to feel I was approaching it correctly.

 

What I Learned:

  • Unique Experiences: Emotions manifest differently for everyone. I see objects rather than colors; sadness feels like a heavy stone, while other unpleasant emotions appear as metal pipes in my sternum.

  • Quick Processing: Most emotions pass in 90 seconds or less. Processing them saves time compared to unproductive responses like ruminating or procrastinating.

  • Neutral Messengers: Emotions are neither good nor bad; they simply provide valuable information about ourselves.

  • Savoring Positives: Recognizing positive emotions like love and joy enhances well-being and performance.


Prior to this, I had no idea how much better my life could be from learning how emotions manifest and how to process them.

 

The first time I put this into practice, I was giving a lesson to a group of women at my church. Teaching is not my forte. Being in front of a crowd with all eyes on me is one of the most stressful situations I can find myself in. Instead of trying not to think about it, I decided to recognize what came up for me. Anxiety was the emotion I targeted. I acknowledged anxiety, welcomed it, thanked it for trying to protect me, and paid attention to what was happening in my body. My heart was beating faster and harder, almost visibly. I felt a “buzzing” in my chest like butterflies trying to escape their Mason jar prison, and noticed my breathing sped up. But sure enough, all this lasted less than 90 seconds! Then I was back “online,” and the teaching experience was one of the best I’d had. I let anxiety run its course and allowed my higher cognitive powers to carry me through the lesson.

 

Benefits of Processing Emotions:

 

  • Enhanced Performance: Improved physical and mental performance.

  • Effective Communication: Better outcomes in tough conversations.

  • Increased Productivity: Less procrastination and quicker decision-making.

  • Reduced Overwhelm: Less mental clutter and ruminating.

  • Inner Guidance: Finding answers within rather than seeking validation.

  • Self-Challenge: Greater willingness to embrace challenges and step out of my comfort zone.

  • True Confidence: Building self-trust and genuine confidence.

  • Better Relationships: Deeper connections with others.

  • Stress Management: Better handling of stress and pressure.

 

This journey is ongoing, and I’m far from perfect, but life is richer from this shift in thinking. I’m inspired to share this magic with others.

 

In my next blog, I’ll provide specific ways to process emotions. For now, I wanted to share my journey so you can see that a more fulfilled and enriched life is possible for you too.

 

High Five!


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