Stop Shooting Yourself
Updated: Feb 5
"When you argue with reality, you lose, but only 100% of the time." ~Byron Katie
I love this quote, but let’s be honest—it conveniently slips my mind whenever life throws a curveball. You know, like when I step on the scale and see a number higher than last time. Cue dramatic sigh.
But here’s the thing: that number is just a fact. It has zero emotional weight (pun intended) until I slap a thought on it. Reality says, “Hey, this number is higher.” That’s it. No judgment, no drama.
The first arrow is reality: the number on the scale. The second arrow? That’s all me, my friend. It’s the mental barrage that follows: “Why did I eat that extra bowl of ice cream?” or “I have no self-control.” Ouch. That second arrow hurts way more than the first because I shot it myself.
But what if I didn’t? What if I chose a different thought? Lately, I’ve been lifting heavier weights. If I look at that same number and think, “Wow, I’m building muscle,” suddenly there’s no suffering. Just pride, maybe even a little flex in the mirror.
This proves the number on the scale isn’t the villain. It’s neutral. The story I tell about it determines whether I feel miserable or motivated.
Which brings me to this: "I am not my circumstances; circumstances are me." At first glance, that might sound like philosophical word soup, but stick with me. It means I’m not defined by what happens around me. Instead, the way I interpret and respond to my circumstances comes from within. My thoughts shape my reality.
So, when life happens (first arrow), I get to decide if I’ll add unnecessary suffering (second arrow) or if I’ll adjust my aim.
And here’s the bullseye: When you change your thoughts, you change your life.
What’s a “second arrow” you’ve caught yourself firing? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments! Or schedule a free conversation and let's talk about it in person!
High five ✋
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